Filed In: (in)fertility
I am not a medical professional. This is what I experienced during my most recent miscarriage. Please seek medical attention if you are concerned about your pregnancy. Call a doctor immediately if you are soaking through more than one pad an hour or losing large clots.
The whole experience is sad and scary, but I think the not knowing what to expect or what the hell is happening to your body makes it worse. The pain and what your body goes through is shocking and a kick in the teeth after finding out your baby died. It’s traumatic – mind, body, and soul.
Plan on that. Make space to grieve. Let people help you. Be alone if you need to be alone. Scream. Cry. Laugh. Grieve however you need to. It all sucks. There’s no need to pretend that it doesn’t. You’re in pain. Allow it.
WARNING: What follows is detailed. I don’t want to scare you, so maybe don’t read it unless it’s relevant. Feel free to bookmark, pin, or share.
I think it’s easy to forget about the other half of the equation when dealing with pregnancy loss and infertility. It happens to the mama’s body, so it’s easy to assume your partner isn’t feeling the same emotions or doesn’t (or couldn’t) understand.
David absorbed all of the impact during our years of miscarriages and unsuccessful fertility treatments. He bore the brunt of all my anger and fear and frustration. He held onto hope when I no longer could. He grabbed my hand when I was numb and didn’t even know who I was anymore.
a guest post from Perfectly Port
I’m so excited to be partnering with Erin from Perfectly Port today! We connected on Instagram and have a million things in common. I know you’ll appreciate her story. You can check out my post on her blog at www.perfectlyportfamily.com.
Hi, my name is Erin and I am a wife to Scott, mom to Solon (7), Vera (5) and Lucille (1). I love God and I love to encourage women because being a wife, mother, friend and all the other titles we hold can be so rewarding but so hard too! I blog over at www.perfectlyportfamily.com. I am so excited to be guest posting here with Molly today and sharing a piece of my story with you!
The road to motherhood is different for every woman and this week it’s National Infertility Awareness Week. Although my story is not tied directly with infertility, I hope it brings encouragement to you wherever you are in your mothering journey.
If you are experiencing issues with fertility and are looking for some things to try, please keep reading.
However, if you’re not in a place to think about that right now, or if you’ve had enough of others’ attempts to “fix it”, maybe bookmark this and come back to it later.
It’s not my intention to say, “We did all this, and it totally worked! You should do it, too!” All I want is to share some of the things we tried, to offer potentially new ideas, to give a little bit of hope. (more…)
With the holidays beginning tomorrow, I wanted to take a moment to send some love your way.
The holidays bring up a lot of anxiety and grief when you’ve miscarried or are struggling to get pregnant.
You are NOT alone. It doesn’t matter if you miscarried five minutes or five months after you got a positive test. There are no false positives. It’s still a loss. It’s a death. It’s being excited and making plans and crying tears of joy and fear and then finding out not this time. Or, if nothing you’re trying is working, it’s kind of the same, isn’t it? You expect something to work, and then you get the “negative” phone call from the nurse.